I am sorry.

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And in your travels, so much happens, things go right, many others go wrong and oh well, that's just how life goes. But among those things is hurt and pain. You will get hurt, you will experience pain, and I'm not just talking physical. A little more importantly, you will cause pain, you will disappoint. And there's quite nothing wrong with that, it happens, flawlessness is a myth.



But at the end of the day, assuming there's remorse and that disappointment and pain wasn't intentional what matters most is what happens next.
I'll try describe what should happen next: you should feel bad about what you did, then think "if I could go back in time,I'd do that differently", then you'll say that you're sorry.
You could be forgiven, or not, that shouldn't bother you much, you're sorry and meant your apology.
But see,the problem now is, the world is becoming blurry-visioned. You cannot see well what is and what is not. You can't tell what is meant and what is isn't, you can't tell if they really feel bad or they're just saying that to brush it off. So forgiveness comes hard.

But if it matters to you that they know you meant it, if it matters to you to be believed, that your apology hits home, do it. Don't just say you're sorry, show them that you are.
Do better, work faster, quit the habit that's making em sad, study harder, do everything you can to undo what you've done. Do everything you can to make up for it.
 There's a vibrance in a do more than there is in a say.
 I don't guarantee forgiveness, I don't guarantee that they'll take you back, that you'll get your job back, but this i do guarantee: that they will believe you are sorry, that they will hurt less, that they might consider forgiveness, that deep down they will always know that if you could, you'd do things differently. That you didn't mean it. I guarantee that karma will forgive. All you have to do is sorry. Don't just say it. don't just say you're sorry, show them that you are and here's a bit of how;

  • express that you are sorry, tell them that you are sorry
  • own that what you did was wrong, maybe even stupid and inconsiderate accept that you screwed up(btw have you read my article on consideration because if you'd have read it, chances are high you wouldn't be here)
  • point it out, name what you did, it goes to show that you aren't just saying it but understand where and how you fucked up
  • name impact,(i hurt you)
  • you are not allowed to decided if they got hurt, do not use "if" (i am sorry if)
  • do not no matter how much urge you get try to blame shift, don't defend (but you...)
  • make amends, try to find out what you can do to make up for whatever you did. sometimes what you did is irreversible but theres something you can do to appease


And if you're on the other end of the narrative, it is paramount that you remember; humanity is imperfection.
I understand they hurt you, I understand it hurts. I understand that they let you down, I understand that they cost you money and time, I understand they make you sick.
But there is nothing more priceless than a chance for redemption. I'm not asking you to forgive them, I'm not asking you to take that shitbag back, I'm not asking you to reemploy that lazy bone. But if they want to make up for their wrongs, it's only fair to the world you let them try. It's only fair you listen to them say sorry, that you let them show you they are sorry.
 You'd want the same



ps.
i said i am sorry, and i apparently really are. But lets not embroil this. Sometimes that does not become my admission of wrong doing or guilt. If anything, it goes to show that i respect whatever association we have, maybe even cherish it. Fact that i am sorry doesn't put you on higher ground or go to feed your ego.
Sometimes, i am sorry that you are wrong. i am sorry for you.


Let's go back to the Basics.

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