The Art of Gifting

I intended to write about this way early into last year because of how shit the gifts I received that year was, but life comes at you so fast I hadn’t gotten time to research and do the yadayada before writing an article such as this. But then I met someone that reignited that spark only this time it was different, the complete opposite. They gifted me with sequences that were the most thoughtful gifts ever, and I mean ever. But then it occurred to me that it was much more than the thoughtfulness of the gifts and thus we are here to explore gifting a little more. I am overflowing with emotion over those gifts as I write this;

Before we delve into it, love languages are meant to be independent as well as integrated and as such, this article is not meant for gifters and lovers that only understand love in gifting rather this is an article for you if you intend to express a little more love into the world, to your loved ones, to your victims. You see dear reader, gifts aren’t only meant for occasion, they create the occasion. Someone in a Space™ we hosted to discuss this said that the recipient of the gift is responsible for how they feel about the gift, and what happened to take responsibility? Then someone else said that the thought counts, which was a most popular solution. But you see Angela, they simply got you a gift, they did not put thought into it, there simply is no thought to count. So as gifting is a love language, I will make a bit of a comparison for you: For physical touch, it isn’t about simply being touched(I mean we shake hands all the time), its about how they touch you and where; For acts of service, it is not about simply having things done for you, its which things and how they get done; for words of affirmation it is not anything, its what you say and how you say it, quality time is not simply about being together, it is about making the time count, therefore, Jennifer, no, the thought does not count. It’s a useless thought if it amounts to anything that’s the bare minimum. If you don’t effort the process, simply do not do it. Everyone around you deserves to be shown love, below is a simple expression of this love.

The Art of Gifting I said, you see gifting is an art: delicate, with heart and a voice. The question is how do you know what to gift someone and the answer lies in understanding the categories of gifts. The trick to gifting is based on preanalysis, the ability to predict how they will feel about each item, and how they will understand the intent of the gift. What does the gift mean to them and what does it mean to you? If the gift means nothing to you it will feel like a waste or worse, it'll feel nothing.  So below is a mid-detailed procedural on what to get someone.

The actual art of gifting

Gifting is perfected through a cover of a person’s needs that that gift looks to accomplish, both physically and emotionally. The first is the significance of the gift, its memorability and its utility. To achieve perfection would be to tease God, and thus it is not a must that all three areas are covered. You just need to decide on which would be more impactful, as such I’ll leave the decision of the hierarchy to you. Remember to not overthink it.

Significance.

Why on earth would someone get you a  gift that has no meaning to it? Doesn’t that defeat the whole point of a gift? The gift you get someone should be significant in that it has meaning to you, the gifter. I do not mean that it's something that you like but it has to answer the question of why YOU are picking that particular item for them. It should represent the relationship that you two share. You could get them a watch because they are always late for a date, or a flavour of cake that you like that you think she should try or even a dress you think she would look good in. You see, the significance of a gift you give is your signature.

Memorability.

Seriously the only reason someone should forget what you get them is that you’ve gotten them so many things that they are losing track of it all. Otherwise, the subtle point to a gift is to have them not forget that you exist and that you care/love them dependent on which message your gift sends. Otherwise, if I get you a gift simply because it was your birthday you’ll forget cause imagine how many people will get you gifts on that day? Preferably something that they will see more of, something whose memory will be triggered a little more frequently. A personal hack is you could never go wrong with a gift that’s a first for someone, be it taking someone somewhere where they haven’t been before, their first velvet infused ice cream or their first coupon somewhere. As long as it’s their first, it’s memorable because every time they see that category of things or those places they will have a happy memory with your face attached to it. Here's a little secret if you look mid like me: a happy memory attached to your face makes your face even more attractive. But the range goes from their first to their best to their biggest to their smallest, making it memorable.

Utility.

For me, this particular category is a bit conflicting. It brings in the time vs gift conversation. Are gifts that last longer better than gifts that do not? (Let me know what you think in the comment or on social media)

But here’s the trick. You need to understand that memorability is not attached to time. Because he gets to wear the necklace for longer does not mean that he’ll remember it for as long compared to something like a dream date. How long they get to have the gift means close to nothing. Memorability of a gift is solely dependent on the gift.

Back to the utility of a gift. My encouragement for everyone that has asked me for gift ideas was always that it has to be something that influences their daily life, something that makes their daily easier or better. If it solves a problem that they have even in the smallest ways. People think that cars as gifts are hyped because they cost more but it's because it solves the transport hustle for someone for a long time.

 

Now, remember that an excellent gift in the Muinde scale has to meet at least a combination of the two of the three. Does not have to meet all three but wouldn’t that be better? It will be difficult to find a gift that meets all these criteria within it, and so the answer is; a gift basket. If you can find an item that fits each one and includes them in the gift package the more better.

Like any other art, gifting gets better with time, the more you do it. The sooner you begin practising the better, so happy gifting.